What I believed disqualified me to be a leader

I remember one evening at church a few years ago they asked everyone to ask God if there was a lie they were believing. The room was dead silent.

Those of us who were ready to gain freedom from these lies were asked to come forward to receive prayer.

I went up and that moment has stuck with me ever since.

The first person to come pray over me was also a leader in our church. I shared with her this deep dark secret that God had just revealed to me. Ready to be see her hold in her laughter, ready to feel judged. I told her.

“The lie I’m believing is that I don’t think I should be in this role as a leader if I can’t get fit, and lose this baby weight. How are others to trust me and let me lead them when I can’t control this?? This baby weight should have been off a long time ago!”

Her words brought comfort. “I feel the same way!”

What???? How is that possible I thought. We stood there together, in tears praying for one another.

I wasn’t alone in feeling disqualified. I wasn’t alone in thinking that my appearance was somehow related to how fitted for purpose I am for something.

I wish I could tell you that in that moment all my insecurities fell off my shoulders. They didn’t. What did happen is I learned that I’m not alone.

I asked my Instagram followers if they felt qualified. The most common response went something like this “I don’t think I am. But God has qualified me to do it. So I trust him”

Webster’s dictionary states Qualified – Fitted (as by trained or experience) for a purpose.

I like that! Fitted for purpose.

I’ve learned that being qualified isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being teachable and faithful. Faithfulness is the goal not perfection.

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