Feed the baby, burp the baby and change the baby. The cycle starts again before you know it. Sleep when the baby sleeps. Dishes get piled, making the bed is a rarity and best of all, the days of the week get all rolled into one long day. This is how I felt the first few weeks with Gem number 3.
What changed? What is it that helped me feel normal again? Below are things that I clearly remember as being a marking point on this getting back to normal – well, getting to the new normal.
1) Real conversation.
I can’t say thank you enough to my friends who brought us meals and my mom who helped keep the house clean in those first few weeks. Every one wants to know how our little Gem is doing, how well is she eating and sleeping, how much rest am I getting, am I taking my iron pills, do I take naps, do I have time to eat, and the list goes on and on. Of course I don’t mind talking about her, and sharing with them this new journey. However, I’d like to know what’s going on with them, what’s happening in our city, in our country. What’s happening other then 3am feedings and being peed on.
One of my best friends came over one day to have tea and to let our kids play together. We just sat and talked about her life. About our church and our (amazing) small group. Yes, we talked about the littlest Gem but that wasn’t all. It was a real conversation.
2) Change of atmosphere
My husband knows how to make me laugh. One day I was feeling low, and he knew how to change that: He made me laugh. Do I remember the specifics? No, but I do know that it not only brightens my day (we laugh daily) , it brings us closer and it reminds me I’m more then just a mom. I’m his wife and he knows just what I need and when.
Getting out of the house helped too. I know when I go to my small group I’m surrounded not only with great support, I know I can count on them too, to make me laugh!
Yes. That says cleaning. I didn’t do dishes or make our bed (embarrassing but true) for the first week or so. I can remember it like yesterday. I stood at the sink washing dishes and thinking ‘Ahh, this is more like it.”
Last but not least…..
4) Spending time with Jesus.
Mothers of new borns pray all the time. ‘Lord, let her sleep a little longer tonight,” “Give me the strength I need to do what I need to do today.” I pray for others (my husband, my friends, church etc.) during 3 am feeds. But really spending time with Him. Reading His word and letting Him speak to me through it. Just me my Bible and my cup of tea. It was at that moment the first time with just Him and I that I understood more then ever. I am complete in HIM.